Building our Self Esteem

To many, self esteem seems to be a big word, and as such many tends to get frightened off with it. In actual fact it is as simple as 'your opinion of yourself'. A quote by Gloria Gayner confirms it......

"Well, we all know that self esteem comes from what you think of you, not what other people think of you"

Recently, I've heard a short article aired through our local radio station mentioning that "Building our self esteem through little promises we've made to our self". After giving it a good thought I realise that it is indeed true! It is something which we our self have in control with and doesn't concern people around us.

Firstly, we need to really look into our own strength and weaknesses. I believe that not many people are able to see their own weakness or for some, even refuse to accept it. As long as we are willing to open up to accept our weakness, then only can we think of what to do to improve on those gray areas or else it is rather impossible for us to build our self esteem.

From my experiences and acquaintances with people from all walks of life, I've come across people who are confident, proud of their status or whatever jobs they are holding, always willing to move ahead, able to take the lead, able to socialise well, joining outside activities, clubs or indulge in sports and many more. On the other hand there are some who have no self confidence, shy, always needs to be led than to lead, only confines to work & home and an endless other reasons.

Secondly, after discovering our weakness then its time for us to ask our self - what should I do and how to improve on it. This is what the speaker mentioned "building our self esteem through little promises we've made to our self". Certain bigger areas we can only work on one thing at a time, but gradually you will come to realise that some are inter related. So, improving on one area might help solve a couple of the other areas. In the end we will hear comments such as "Thank God, only by improving on my public speaking skills, I find myself more confident participating in discussions, able to give innovative ideas, willing to take the lead etc.....etc......."

"They can conquer who believe they can" ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

On the other hand, most of us might have come across people who consider themselves having "high self esteem" but tagging along with strong egoism & personal pride. This type of people will always behave selfishly or rather only thinking of them self, no respect for others and will only fits into their own circle of friends. Let me quote you a live experience of an incident at my ex-workplace some four years ago.

With majority of us having work experience of more than 20 years, there comes a batch of new , young contracted colleagues roughly about the age of our children. Having a generous & helpful heart the senior experience ones tried to impart knowledge to them. Instead of a word of thank you, one young fellow commented "I have my DIPLOMA certificate, I know what to do and you don't need to teach me!"

A quote by Nathaniel Branden best describe the 'should be character' of a high self esteem person:

"There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of self esteem, the more likely one will be to treat others with respect, kindness, and generosity"

We must always bear in mind that 'respect needs to be earned', so if we want people to respect us we must first respect others, which also means 'respect needs to work both ways'.

To end my write-up on "building our self esteem" let me sum up with this beautiful quote........

"To establish true self esteem we must concentrate on our successes and forget about the failures and the negatives in our lives"
~ Denis Waitley ~

A Special Week to boost up happiness.........

"Get Happy Week" is a special week to boost up happiness in our life, and it falls on 1st to 7th May. Whatever worries, problems or difficulties which lingers in our minds & hearts, let us put them all behindand plunge into relaxation, spread happiness, laughter and warm sunshine around. With such heartfelt acts we are sure to bring cheers & smiles to those around us who needs happiness most.

Here's a special card from 123 Greetings to be shared with all great people out there, and hope it will really boost up their happiness, as well as my own self...... Let us all stay happy & healthy!!

Happy May Day!

On this special day of rest, I am sending you all a Smiley to wish everyone a bright, happy, cheerful, joyous & wonderful "MAY DAY!"

"Have A Happy Holiday!"

"Recharging Your Batteries" [Part 6]

From my personal point of view........

In this challenging world today, we can't deny the importance of the needs to take frequent breaks from our hectic daily routines & schedules. With ample educations & exposures through seminars, workshops, conferences, talks, symposiums, associations, clubs and many others, most people especially women are more open up to the social life surroundings of today's modern world.

If we care to look back to the days of our parents, grand parents or even great grand parents....... there seems to be not much of any social life activities which they can pursue. Father, being the bread winner of the family is seen to be out early in the morning & back in the late afternoon pursuing their career, while mother is always seen busy with her endless house chores from very early in the morning till late at night.

I sincerely felt that this article "Recharging Your Batteries" is such an important article which needs to be shared with everyone out there. Though the needs varies from each individuals, the general overview of it is important to help us open up our minds so that we can all have a better understanding of the importance of leisure which enables us to stay healthy, happy and be more productive in performing our daily duties, be it in our working life or at home.

Another point which I fully agree with the author of this article is that, leisure does not necessarily have to be something costly, a holiday or trip to a far away place or taking up some expensive hobbies which not everyone can afford. It must be something which is within our individual means, or else it will end up with more stress than the actual intention of "recharging our batteries".........

"The end of labor is to gain leisure" ~ Aristotle ~

"Those who decide to use leisure as a means of mental development, who love good music, good books, good pictures, good plays, good company, good conversation -- what are they? They are the happiest people in the world"
~ William Lyon Phelps ~

"If you are losing your leisure, look out; you may be losing your soul"
~ Logan P. Smith ~

"They talk about the dignity of work. The dignity is in leisure"
~ Herman Melville ~

"The best intelligence test is what we do with our leisure"
~ Laurence J. Peter ~

"Recharging Your Batteries" [Part 5]

Does your mind always return from vacation when you do?

Even after a marvelous vacation, many people are glad to be home again in familiar surroundings. Others may feel out of synch and disoriented. They are victims of post-vacation dysphoria, or "vacation lag."

This condition results from the mind's reaction to the contrast between an easygoing holiday existence and the pressures of everyday life. It may be especially acute for people in very stressful occupations or for those stuck in jobs they dislike intensely.

One tip for beating post-vacation anxieties: plan to come home a few days before you have to report back to work. A few quiet days of reorientation may make returning to the job easier to handle.

Sometimes vacation lag can push people to make positive changes in their lives. They may simply add extra leisure activities to their week. Or they may decide to change jobs or seek career or psychiatric counseling.

What if you just can't get away?

The value of vacations can hardly be overstated. However, if job pressures prevent you from taking the time off that you have earned, a few stolen moments in the middle of the day can be effective in reducing stress and bringing the change of pace you need. Many companies today encourage longer and more frequent break times, because experts have shown that periodic rest breaks increase worker productivity. Taking a break can also inspire creative solutions to intractable problems.

"Recharging Your Batteries" [Part 4]

What is the best way to spend leisure time?

People's ideas of how to use their leisure vary greatly, of course. For some the perfect way is to settle down with a good book. For others it may be working in the garden, or dancing till dawn on a Caribbean cruise, or back-packing through the Himalayas. Up-bringing and personal tastes, researchers believe, determine which leisure activity is most fulfilling.

Sometimes, social pressure has a lot to do with the choice of a leisure pursuit. People seeking to conform to a fashionable ideal, such as going to a popular resort or an exotic locale, or owning a boat or vacation home, often do so as the risk of increasing their stress rather than reducing it. A simpler, more restful - not to mention less expensive - vacation might have been a better way to recharge mentally and physically.

"Recharging Your Batteries" [Part 3]

Why do some people find it so difficult to relax?

Workaholics tend to see time off as time wasted. They typically feel that every minute has to be devoted to attaining the goals they have set for themselves. They may be corporate presidents or college students, but they share an inability to relax.

An excessive and compulsive drive for achievement may be based on a distortion of a deeply ingrained work ethic. Counselors have found that one way to persuade workaholics to relax is to convince them that time off will improve their productivity, that giving themselves time to refuel will enable them to perform twice as well.

For many, taking it easy is something they must actually learn to do. They have to consult "leisure counselors," who may advise them to try to discover the hidden benefits of leisure by seeking out activities as far removed as possible from the daily routines of the job. A counselor might also recommend that dedicated workaholics join a leisure-oriented club or make a list of things they have always secretly wanted to do.

"Recharging Your Batteries" [Part 2]

What is the healthiest way to approach a vacation?

Anyone setting out on a vacation should firmly resolve to put day-to-day responsibilities not only out of sight but out of mind. The most beneficial vacations are real breaks from everyday life. It is also important to approach a vacation with an open mind. This means being willing to accept what the vacation has to offer, come what may, and being ready to savor the new and the different. It means being able to relax despite the minor inconveniences of travel that invariably arise.

Some people want constant stimulation during their vacations. They must see everything on their itinerary and end their evenings in a disco. Others prefer to sightsee for a couple of hours a day and then take advantage of free time to unwind. "Real relaxation lies in the enjoyment of experience," says one specialist in the use of leisure. If family or friends are along, this expert urges, it is important to spend some time alone every day. This need to be no more than 20 minutes, but too much togetherness can bring its own irritations.

No one has written more felicitously about getting away from it all than the American author John Steinbeck in his book Travels With Charley. "A trip, a safari, an exploration, is an entity, different from all other journeys. It has personality, temperament, individuality, uniqueness. A journey is a person in itself; no two are alike. And all plans, safeguards, policing and coercion are fruitless. We find after years of struggle that we do not take a trip; a trip takes us. Tour masters, schedules, reservations, brass-bound and inevitable, dash themselves to wreckage on the personality of the trip. In this a journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it."

"Recharging Your Batteries" [Part 1]

Today's working people are more prone to stress due to heavy work commitments, competitive work environments, economic down turn, over expectations from employers as well as family members and many other unavoidable situations.........

This useful article which I've read is worth sharing to enable us to manage our stress level, by having a better understanding of this simple phrase "Recharging your batteries".

How important is leisure?

Many psychologists see leisure as an essential counterbalance to work. Overwork can contribute to harmful stress and can diminish the ability to concentrate and to perform a job effectively. Leisure activities refresh and revitalize the body and the mind.

The brain, according to experts, needs stimulation of various kinds in order to stay in top form. Some of us do not mind repetitive daily routines, but others are bored by them, especially if they continue over weeks and months. When this occurs, the brain adapts by reducing its level of activity, but then the brain has mechanisms that kick in and arouse a need for stimulation. A craving for a change of pace, even a desire for excitement, can occur. Leisure, by offering a change of routine, can be one way of getting the brain working at the top of its form again.

Too much change, however, can be as bad as no change at all. If your schedule is never the same from day to day, you may begin to long for peace and quiet and for time to relax and restore yourself. Cravings like these many be linked to the levels of neurotransmitters in your brain.

"Cheerfullness and contentment are great beautifiers and are famous preservers of youthful looks"
~ Charles Dickens ~

"A Happy & Blessed Easter"

Again, on this special season of the year, I would like to wish everyone out there, near & far 'A Happy & Blessed Easter'. May God's abundance blessings, graces & prayers be always upon us all...........